Run Down

All right. Even though I don’t have a clever post in mind at the moment I’m really feeling rather weary about the fact that my last post is titled “Mafia Bitch Geese” and I know my mother reads this (actually my mom may have found that post to be more hilarious than anyone else, but still). So I’m gonna just give a quick run-down of all that has been going on in my neck of the woods, that is, Bulgaria in case you’re new.

My satellite group and I finished Pre-Service Training with a bang and I passed my language test (phewph!).

We had a big Swearing-In ceremony in Vratsa before all being swept away to our permanent sites. I didn’t get to say the good-byes I would have liked to but I will be seeing all my PC friends soon as we are getting together for a week-long training at the end of August (I can’t wait).

Tom, from my satellite group sent me a long good-bye letter through facebook that made me cry (in the living room of a Bulgarian family that I had only just met that day). It was just what I needed to hear as I was feeling a bit lonely and overwhelmed. That first weekend alone in my new apartment was, yet again, a “what in the world have I gotten myself into” moment. But it passed and now I’m starting to feel as though this new place is really home.

Next week I start teaching two adult English courses (yikes!) as well as summer school for the kids. It will be nice to be busy and involved in the community. I’m anxious to really get to know people and make some friends.

My Bulgarian tutoring starts tomorrow. My counterpart, Reni, will be my tutor and we will study three hours every week, a welcome change to the three hours every day that I was studying in Pre-Service Training. Though, I really can’t wait to be able to speak Bulgarian well enough to have real conversations with those around me. Right now, I can really only talk to my counterpart and a very nice girl named Marietta who has befriended me. She is 25 and getting married next month and within 20 minutes of meeting her she invited me to the wedding. I love Bulgarians!

I’m still struggling with the same issue that I have been since day 1: How to make an impact. I have all the answers tucked away somewhere in my brain. Every time I doubt myself or my purpose here they just come flying out of nowhere. Quotes from Peace Corps staff, other volunteers, friends, family, bible verses, even things I’ve told myself. I know why I’m here. I know what I’m capable of as well as my limits but I still can’t seem to shake the feeling that I have no idea what I’m doing. I plan to have a positive attitude, to work hard and do absolutely everything I can think of to help my new community but I feel like this is going to be one of those experiences where I gain far more than I give. But, that’s a good thing, right? I’ll welcome the idea the best my overachieving, America brain can and even embrace the mistakes I will, without a doubt, make on a daily basis. Time to get serious.

I’ll be getting internet in my apartment soon which means pictures! Yeah! I have so much to share and since a picture is worth a thousand words and I’m pretty lazy I’ll just let them do the talking.

-Age