I'm Really Good at Awkward. Ask Anyone.

Have you ever noticed how sometimes it’s uncomfortable to write, “I love you,” when “I love ya,” is effortless? What’s the difference? Just a couple ‘a letters. Oh, but it’s so much more than that. “Love ya” has a very relaxed and harmless vibe while “love you” is heavy with the potential for misinterpreted meaning. Saying “I love you” out loud is no problem. You use inflection, facial expressions, and tone to convey your meaning. But in writing, whether through facebook, chat, blogs or what have you, it’s almost always safer to go with the “ya.”


Or even just saying, “I miss you,” or, “can’t wait to see you,” can be misinterpreted. Was it said with longing? Is there a hidden meaning? Is the person trying to imply more than just that simple statement? The “what if’s” start to fly around in your brain, whether welcome or not, and they just can’t be stopped. Which is why we’re careful about how we phrase things to others, cuz we know how our own brain works and we don’t want to give the wrong impression or seem like an overly affectionate creeper.

“I can’t wait to see you…”

It starts out all happy and excited and innocent in your mind but travels through your arms, fingers, keyboard, and internet, coming out the other end full of suggestive meaning. Or, at least, that’s how you think the other person might take it. That’s when “ya” comes in handy. Very few have ever said, “Can’t wait to see ya,” in a suggestive way. That’s mostly because very few are capable. I imagine James Bond (any of ‘em) and Angelina Jolie could get away with it but the rest of us? Not so much.

So “ya” becomes a safety net for keeping things in the friend zone and making absolutely sure that we don’t cause others to question our motives. I do like saying “I love you” to friends and I always mean it, but I try to limit myself when saying it to a friend who is obviously uncomfortable with the affectionate phrase. I want them to know that I love them but I don’t want to make them feel awkward when they are, for whatever reason, incapable of saying it back. I used to have trouble saying it to anyone, it didn’t feel natural. But I practiced and now it’s one of my favorite phrases. But, again, in person. In print, it’s gonna be “ya.” Just to be on the safe side.

There’s also a fun trick that I started with a friend of mine over skype. We decided to end each statement with the tone of the message. Such as:

“I love you. (but, like, totally just as a friend. I mean, nothing funny, just a friendly thing with nothing attached.)”

Or

“I can’t wait to see you. (cuz we’re friends and that’s all. And I like hanging out with you but I’m not, like, secretly in love with you or anything. I don’t fantasize about having your children or meeting your parents, I just look forward to hanging out…as friends.)”

But, I figure, a subtle “ya” is way easier, though not nearly as awkward. And, I don’t wanna brag but, I do awkward really well.

Love ya.

-Age