In my life, I’ve been unbridled by addiction. I’ve never smoked a cigarette. In fact, I’ve also shunned kissing anyone who smokes as that is not a fun flavor – at all (cigars and pipes are OK, though I believe only men over the age of 50 smoke those habitually and I also have a rule about kissing old people that aren’t my grandparents).
I don’t drink often (though I do occasionally drink excessively – but usually not on purpose and my lack of regular alcohol consumption often means that “excessive” interprets itself as 4 beers and me stumbling around as if I’ve cleaned out the bar).
I Just Say No to drugs. I feel as though I owe this not only to my strong moral character *snicker* but to my very bestest friend, Amanda, who would probably punch me in the face for using the word bestest. You see, when we were little, like elementary little, we were asked to make posters for an anti-drug contest. We were to create something interesting, funny or insightful and enter it to win a big prize. Except that we were children so instead of creating posters that were interesting, funny, or insightful, we instead created total crap. We were nine. Though, Amanda, who has always been artistically inclined and has frustratingly never pursued it, made a fantastic poster. And won.
It said,
“Drugs are for thugs with ugly mugs, I think they eat bugs.”
Simple. Brilliant. She also drew a picture of a drug-user with an ugly mug and bugs in his teeth. How could anyone not give her a prize for something so cheeky and wonderful!
Anyway, like I was saying, I’m not an “addict.” Or at least not the kind of addict that could ever end up on Intervention. I avoid that type of judgement like the plague. That’s actually a perfect analogy as I don’t actively avoid the plague or heavy judgement – I think the plague’s pretty much been taken care of and I’m far too Idealistic and focused on perfecting my hopelessly flawed self to be aware of any intense scrutiny. Again, I’m off topic. Basically, I prefer quiet, subtle addictions like coffee and sitcoms.
Case in point: despite the fact that it was 7.50лв, I purchased a 28 pack of 3 in 1 Nescafe coffee recently, each individual serving giving me that feeling of wholeness. OK, maybe it’s not that extreme but I do love the stuff. My love affair with Diet Coke is still as strong as ever but, just to be safe, I try not to drink 3 in 1 in front of my her so as not to insight jealousy. I’ve also just realized Diet Coke is a girl, hence the feminine pronoun, it must be the shapely curve of the bottle…or the fact that’s it’s superior to all other, male sodas. I actually don’t feel that men are inferior to women at all despite my teasing. They have plenty of great qualities that make them quite useful. Like opening jars with really tight lids and keeping the American Football industry alive – I mean, what would all the beer-bellied, adequately inebriated guys do on Monday night if not paint each other’s faces and high five over their Budweisers?
I feel lucky that in a world full of addictive opportunities I’ve been able to remain relatively clean and well-caffeinated. Wouldn’t it be nice if waking up early, exercising, and washing the dishes were addicting? Though, I suppose, what people are addicted to would be the good feeling they receive from their drug of choice which, when thought of that way, means addiction isn’t all that bad. It’s not the enemy. It’s the object of addiction that’s the problem. If it hurts the addict or others, it’s a bad addiction. If it betters the world, like a workaholic who finds a cure for cancer, than it’s a good addiction. It’s all relative.
Once again, an aspect of life becomes tricky. Very tricky. You know what would help me to wrap my brain around this issue a little better…
-Age
